Virginity Vice Versa

The brief

The area that we decided to explore following the sessions with Anwar was virginity. In our group there were girls from different cultures and it was clear to us that in some societies, and some corners of our own, attitudes to virginity are unequal. The brief was to explore this is a way that would be entertaining.

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How we decided to respond to the brief

The first thing we had to do was research different attitudes to virginity - which we did online. As the film had to be very short it was hard to decide what to keep in and what not to. We wanted our film to show that some young adults - and not only females - feel judged by whether or not they have ever had sexual intercourse. Virginity can become a label that affects a person's reputation. For instance, in many cultures and religions, it’s considered a necessary moral virtue to maintain your virginity until marriage, as this apparently symbolises purity. The other side of the coin is that women who’re not virgins can be slut shamed and persecuted. Whereas for men it is sometimes seen as a badge of honour not to be a virgin. However the downside of that is that if a man does not want to have sex yet, or has not managed to find a partner, they can be mocked by other men. 

For example in our research we found a story about Matthew Bennett, 29, who on TV said he was a virgin. He then later received several hate comments from his fans accusing him of lying and acting. They did not believe he was a virgin, mainly because he was 29. Another report we read was in the Guardian, about a 20-year-old woman who felt ‘pressured’ to lose her virginity and had therefore had problems with her body image since she was 14. She said, “the pressure of not having sex is overwhelming - people look down on you when you say you haven’t. I feel people judge me as immature because I’m a virgin”. In the film we refer to a report about 80 female migrants who had to undergo a virginity test after arriving at UK airports in the 70’s. In other research we learned about a woman who killed herself after her husband refused to believe the results of a virginity test that he forced her to take. Although she ‘passed’ the test’, he still took a second wife, and in the report was quoted as claiming that, “My wife gave me a written statement that she allows me to get a second wife because she wasn't a virgin when we got married.” 

We needed a device to drive the film, so we created two profiles on the dating app Badoo, one for each gender.  Both people posted “I’m a virgin” in their bios. The idea of this was to gather different reactions from the public. We hoped to be able to compare the unequal responses to the same statement, but in the end the reactions were not as extreme as we had expected. Most of the men were respectful of the woman, and the man hardly got any comments at all. What was interesting however was the use of the word ‘pure’ in relation to the woman, which is of course an unfair value judgement. The women did get a couple of insulting messages, about why she might not have had sex but as they were not representative we thought it would be unfair to include them.

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What we think of the end result

The outcome of our film was uneven. The way we handled the Badoo messages was very effective. We filmed the man and woman in profile in harsh light - which added drama and intimacy. By running the texts over the screen we allowed the audience to feel that the texts were maybe addressed to them, which meant they could feel more involved. We also think that including some extreme close up shots of people’s eyes added drama because it makes the viewer feel challenged by the direct stare. The Badoosection is therefore a strength of the film, but also a weakness. This is because the messages did not do what we thought they would do, which was prove that there are extreme views out there. We could not alter the structure though and so we have to be satisfied with a film that is more subtle in its messaging than we had intended. For the more extreme end of the issue we included details of some of the research we had carried out. Although this works up to a point, on reflection there is too much text for the viewer to read.

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Three specific things that we learned

• As a group we learned that making a film is difficult and leads to disagreements. It is therefore vital to are able to negotiate difficulties in a calm and unemotional way.

• We also learned the importance of planning. Although we thought we had planned the film carefully there were details we forgot, which was part of the reason things did not go as well as we would have liked.

• Part of planning is time management, and we were unrealistic about how long things take to do. So we learned that once you have estimated the time it will take to do something, you should then double it!

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Conclusion

What we enjoyed most was being allowed some creative and organisational autonomy. At university you have to do a lot of what you are told so it was a great experience to be given some freedom. Yes we made mistakes, but we learned from them. Overall through working with The Samosawe think we are all better prepared for the professional world outside college. We also valued the chance to think about issues that are important to our peers, and to try and communicate some of them.

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Sexualisation & Society - A Samosa Media and UEL Journalism Project